In 2017, Toluna Research, a market research firm, conducted a study on behalf of Dairy Queen to determine both singles’ and couples’ attitudes about Valentine’s Day. The research found an interesting detail, that single men are more likely to be sad on Valentine’s Day than women. Further, one in four single men are likely to […]
In the 2001 movie, Moulin Rouge, one of the best lines in the movie is “The greatest thing you will ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.” I have to admit that this is my favorite love story of all time, not to mention it has the greatest movie soundtrack I […]
In our new book Tech-Pecked or Tuned In: Finding God in a Digital World we share a great deal of research about how technology use can have a negative effect on the brain. Concepts like “switch cost “which is the time it takes to get refocused on a project after you get interrupted by the […]
Isaiah shares God promise in Isaiah 26:3, “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, whose thoughts are fixed on you.” We can’t keep our thoughts fixed on God if we are interrupted by our phones. With the average user checking his or her phone every 6.5 minutes or an average of […]
It seems that feeling and expressing gratitude is touted by everyone from talk-show hosts to magazine editors. Oprah, Dr. Oz, Women’s Day all declare the virtues of Gratitude. Gratitude Journals pop up everywhere especially in this season of Thanksgiving which is an entire holiday dedicated to…well Gratitude. The reason is simple; Gratitude is good for […]
“You should see a counselor!” or “You’re crazy! You should see a psychiatrist!” are not the phrases you want to hear from your mom, dad, sister, brother or friend. Often times we hear phrases like these in the middle of arguments or times of high stress. What we forget to understand is that these coarse […]
The following is a story from our book, Soul Healing Love. It illustrates how we have trauma that is processed and stored in the “old brain” or the amygdala and hippocampus if you are interested! This trauma can be triggered in one sixteenth of a second! One of the most common places it gets triggered […]
Tom and wrote this article 20 years ago for a newsletter for Association for Couples and Marriage Enrichment and it is even more valid for today’s couples and families. The clock goes off at 6:30 am, and our team effort starts. Together we pack children’s lunches, make sure book bags are loaded and papers are […]
Famous marriage researcher, Dr. John Gottman, studied marriage for decades at the University of Washington in Seattle. He now trains therapists and writes books on his findings. He actually had a “love-lab” where couples came and lived, and were observed via hidden camera. These couples were also wired to biofeedback machines to determine their levels […]
A short piece by Dr. Beverly Rodgers on resolving conflicts that arise from money related issues in marriage.
Every marriage has conflict. In fact, famous marital researcher, Dr. John Gottman, says good marriages that last the test of time are not void of conflict. Healthy couples just know how to resolve these inevitable disagreements. It has been our experience as marital therapists for the last 40 years that most couples fight about superficial, surface issues, and often miss the real reasons that lie beneath their anger. The chronic conflict over your husband not cleaning up his crumbs from the counter may not really be about crumbs at all. There could be a deeper root. Finding the deeper root can help couples resolve conflict and even bring healing to each other.